After Lexi passed away I struggled a lot with the purpose of prayer. I (along with many others) had prayed fervently for so many years for her to find healing. She did find health and sobriety for almost a year. And then suddenly she was gone.

Why even pray? I thought to myself. Does it even make a difference? If God already has a plan, what good does it even do to ask anything from Him?

Have you ever asked yourself this same question? Why pray?

Philippians 4:6-7 has helped me. “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Clearly we are to bring our requests to God. And verse 7 tells us why.

Not because he needs to know what our concerns are. He’s all-knowing.

Not so he can immediately solve all our problems. He’s not a magic genie.

But because when we bring our cares to Him, he can surround us and protect us with his ever-loving peace.

When I bring my requests to God, I can feel comfort in the fact that my Creator who loves me deeply will listen and calm my anxious heart in a way that cannot be explained. Prayer isn’t about getting our way; it’s about communing with our Creator and finding restful assurance deep down in our souls.

As I began to realize and appreciate this, I started to see that God actually had answered my prayers for Lexi. There were many times when her life had been spared. Times when she had been in dangerous situations, when she went without diabetes supplies, and even times when she had wound up in the ICU. In many instances, her life had been preserved, and I know my prayers somehow played into that.      

And then it occurred to me that God had answered my prayer in the best and most complete way possible. I had desperately wanted Lexi to be healed, safe, and happy. Hadn’t God provided that? She is in heaven, experiencing unexplainable joy. Yes, of course, selfishly I want her here with me. But as a mother, wouldn’t I be willing to sacrifice anything for the well-being of my child? If so, can I sacrifice my own pleasure of having her here with me, in order for her to be completely healed? Do I love her enough to put aside my selfish wants, for what is best for her? Though it pains me, of course, I do. And knowing she is there with Him truly gives me a peace that “surpasses all understanding.”

It’s definitely a mystery – the way that prayer works. On this side of heaven, we will never fully understand it. But we have a God that we can trust with all the mysteries, and who promises peace when we lean on Him.

“Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.”              Hebrews 4:16